Love, Hurt, and Family
by avengerteam
Summary: On his first Valentine's Day out of the ice, Steve gets a big surprise. Two days later, his world comes crashing down again. Can the team help Steve heal?
1. Chapter 1

It was Valentine's Day.

Steve was wandering around Avenger (formerly Stark) Tower, trying to find something productive to do with himself. It was still early morning, but he had been haunted the night before by dreams of Bucky falling from the train, of men dying because of his decisions, of Peggy...

He shook himself. _No good in crying about it, Rogers, _he scolded himself. _It won't change a thing. _By now, he was used to being the odd man out. Tony had Pepper, Bruce was back with Betty, Natasha and Clint had finally bowed to the inevitable and were dating. Tony had taken to pointing out attractive women anytime the Avengers went anywhere. "See that one, Capsicle? Bet she wouldn't mind dating Captain America. Should I go tell her you're available?"

By now, Steve had wound up in the kitchen on the rec floor, where the Avengers spent most of their free time together, sparring, having target practice, or trying to reintroduce Steve and introduce Thor to the fine movies of the late 21st century. He sighed and went to rummage in the refrigerator. Generally, he wound up making breakfast for everyone, because he was always the first one up in the morning. "Ummm.. JARVIS?", he asked tentatively. He still wasn't used to Tony's A.I. listening to everything he said. "Who is in the tower this morning?"

"_Good morning, Captain Rogers. The current occupants of the tower are: Sir, Miss Potts, Miss Romanoff, Mr Barton, and Doctor Banner. I believe that Mr Odinson, Miss Foster and Miss Ross will be arriving this afternoon.," replied_ JARVIS.

"Thank you JARVIS," Steve muttered. Breakfast for six, and lunch later for nine. Dinner was on everyone else for Valentine's day.

Three hours later, everyone was finishing breakfast when Tony finally appeared. He had clearly been working on some project that had kept him up most of the night, because contrary to general belief, Tony was usually in the kitchen by eight, drinking copious amounts of black coffee and ribbing Steve about his refusal to use any but the most basic kitchen appliances. The Avengers hid smiles as Tony crept up behind Pepper and suddenly kissed her cheek, laying a red rose next to the Starkpad she was reading the news on.

"Happy Valentine's Day!", he announced to the group as a whole, sliding into the chair next to Pepper and starting in on his first mug of coffee. "What are our plans for today, lovebirds?"

Natasha and Clint looked at each other. "We have no..." Natasha started to say, but was cut off by Clint.

"We're leaving at 4:30 to go out to dinner at _El Grillo,_" he pronounced, naming one of Natasha's favorite restaurants. She squealed and threw her arms around Clint, beaming.

"Betty gets here at 11, along with Thor and Jane, and we're going out on a double date later in the afternoon," Bruce chimed in. "We should be back by 6 or so." Pepper looked at Tony.

"You have a board meeting at noon, but we have early reservations for that Italian place after that, at 4." Tony swore.

"Can we just skip the damn board meeting? Plllleeeeeaaaseeee?" he whined. Pepper held her ground, shaking her head and giving him the look the rest of the team knew mean business. "Fine," Tony moaned. "Meeting first, romantic dinner later. What about you Capsicle? Any plans?" Steve shook his head. "Well then, I have a plan for you," said Tony. He handed Steve a folded piece of paper. Giving Tony a puzzled look, Steve pulled it open. On it was written: **Springview Nursing Home, Room 118**.

For a second, Steve had no idea what he was looking at. Then it hit him and he gasped. Was it...? He whipped his head up to look at Tony. "Go get her, lover boy," Tony laughed. Steve smiled, hope and anxiety warring inside him, and ran out of the room to go get dressed.


	2. Chapter 2

At 3, Steve was standing on the sidewalk outside Springview Nursing Home, clutching a boquet of white roses and the slip of paper Tony had handed him at breakfast. He was wearing his old army uniform, shoes polished, but no hat. What would he do if she didn't recognize him? What if she didn't remember? What if she had shut him out after the crash happened and he never showed up for that dance?

Steve took a breath and pulled open the door. A bell chimed and the young receptionist looked up at him, smiling kindly. "Can I help you with something?"

"I'm looking for Peggy..." Steve paused. If Peggy had gotten married, she would have a new last name. "Room 118."

"Peggy Carter?" asked the receptionist. Steve nodded and his heart jumped. "Down this hall and on the right." Taking another deep breath, Steve followed the hallway she pointed to and paused outside a door with the label 118. He took another deep breath, pushing all the "What ifs" into the back of his mind and pulled it open.

She was sitting in a bed facing the window on the opposite room. Steve could see her hair, now silver, still cut in the same style that it had been 70 years ago. "Who is it?" she called out, and her voice was still hers. Carefully, Steve walked into the room and into her line of sight. "Steve?", Peggy gasped. He nodded, not trusting himself to speak, all of his concerns vanishing. "They told me you were alive... I didn't know where you were, though."

"I was here, in New York. I live with the Avengers in the tower." He hesitated, then picked up her frail hand from the covers, holding it in his own. "You are still every bit as beautiful as I remember you being." And she was. The face he remembered was blurred by age and years in the sun, wrinkled and lined with smiles and tears, but it was still Peggy's face, and when she smiled at him, it was still her sweet smile. After a pause Steve said, "I'm so sorry Peggy. I'm so sorry."

Peggy frowned at him, her eyes filling with tears. "What are you sorry for, Steve? You came back to me, after all of these years."

"I promised you a dance. And I said I wouldn't be late. And here I am 70 years later." Steve avoided her eyes. "I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you when you were sad. I wasn't there to kiss you when you were happy. I never got to tell you over and over how much I loved you. I left you with a promise..." He trailed off.

"Steve Rogers. Look at me." Steve obeyed the command, finding Peggy's soft, aged, brown eyes with his sharp blue ones. "I missed you for so many years. I never fell in love again. I always remembered that you loved me and I always loved you. And here you are, and here I am. You owe me a dance."

Steve hesitated. "Can we?" he asked finally. Peggy reached out to him, and he helped her stand up, supporting her frail weight with his own frame as she leaned over to turn on a radio. Music flowed around them.

They danced. They cried. They laughed. After a hour or so, Peggy's legs and knees couldn't support her anymore, and Steve scooped her up into his arms and took her back to her bed. Peggy yawned. "Steve... I love you" she murmured as she fell asleep.

Steve looked at her beautiful face, heard her voice, and smiled gently. "I love you too, Peggy."


	3. Chapter 3

It was two days after Valentine's Day and Steve was still finding himself smiling at random times, thinking about Peggy. Her smile, the way she moved, and how she said she loved him.

The Avengers were crashed in the movie room on the rec floor, arguing about that night's movie. The girls were all in for _Titanic_, Pepper, Betty, Jane, and Natasha claiming it was a classic that Steve and Thor needed to see. Tony, Bruce and Clint were arguing for _Mission: Impossible, _since Thor and Steve would clearly appreciate the action involved. Thor was sitting on the floor in the middle arguing that if they did not chose the ladies' movie, Natasha would execute them all. Steve was about to assure Thor that no, Natasha would not execute them all, when his phone rang.

He excused himself and walked away from the group towards the wall of glass on one side of the room, fumbling to get his phone out of his pocket. It always took him a moment to remember how to answer it, which was embarrassing when he was around Tony, who seemed to breathe technology.

"Hello?" Steve hadn't recognized the number, wasn't sure who would be calling him at night, on his cell phone.

"Is this Captain Rogers?" The voice was unfamiliar and Steve was starting to get worried.

"Yes... who is this?" he asked hesitantly.

"This is Doctor Newhause from Springview Nursing Home. I'm afraid I have some bad news for you." Steve suddenly felt dizzy. He put a hand on the glass wall next to him. "Peggy Carter passed away about an hour ago. I'm sorry for your loss."

Steve realized that he was on the floor, shaking like a leaf. He couldn't do this, not in front of his team. In the back of his mind, Doctor Newhause was still talking, but Steve only heard a few words. His heart was crying out to Peggy, the love of his life, the last thing holding him to 1944.

Suddenly, the phone, which he was holding like a lifeline, was being gently tugged out of his hand. Tony was standing above him, and the rest of the team was kneeling around him, asking what was wrong, but Steve couldn't tell them. To say it out loud would be to admit it as truth, and he couldn't handle that. Tony was on the phone talking to the Doctor about what happened, he could tell the team.

"Guys..." Tony's voice broke through unsteadily. "It's Peggy... Oh, Steve." Steve felt hands on his arms, circling him and hugging him, and a single tear rolled down his cheek. He fought the rest of them back. Not in front of his team. He couldn't be weak in front of his team. Bruce's warm hand brushed the tear from his cheek.

"Steve, it's okay," he said. "Go ahead and cry." Steve jerked his head back and forth.

"Steve, let it go," whispered Natasha..

And he did. Steve sat on the floor of Avenger Tower, surrounded by his friends and sobbed, mourning Peggy Carter and the time he had lost.

When he woke up on the couch the next morning, it was raining. The other Avengers and their dates were sprawled out on the floor around him. He smiled sadly, the feeling odd, as if he was never supposed to do it again. Steve wove through the sleeping forms to his room, and sat down on his bed. He took the picture of Peggy off of the table with his alarm clock and looked at it. It was old, the last picture he had of her from 1944. Tony had offered to get it copied and restored, and Steve had accepted, knowing that eventually the photograph would fade away.

Steve sighed and stood up. Breakfast. He needed to make breakfast. After a moment of hesitiation, he took the photograph of Peggy with him.

When he got to the kitchen, Tony was already there. "Hey Capsicle," Tony offered, giving him a small smile. "How are you?" Steve gave a non-comittal shrug and put the photograph of Peggy on a shelf that he could see while he cooked. He could feel Tony's eyes on him and the picture as he went to the refrigerator and pulled out eggs and cheese.

Tony spoke again. "The funeral is in a week. I've taken care of it." Steve's heart ached as he thought about Peggy, about her body leaving him forever, just like he had left her 70 years ago.

Tony must have read this on his face, because he got up and walked around the island to where Steve was and put a hand on his shoulder. Steve saw Tony take a breath, as if he was going to say something, and cut him off. "I left her Tony, 70 years ago. And now she's gone." There was so much pain and guilt inside him. He felt like if Tony said one more word about Peggy, he might start to cry again, and once was enough.

Tony opened his mouth again, but what he said was not what Steve was expecting. "Steve, when I was in Afghanistan... there was a man named Yinsen there with me. He was my friend, he saved my life, he helped me get out. Yinsen... he gave his life so I could escape. When I found him, he had at least twelve bullets in him. He died in my arms. But his last words to me were 'Don't waste it. Don't waste your life.'" Tony's eyes were sad as he looked at his grieving friend. "Steve, don't waste your life. Peggy loved you. You took that ship down because you loved Peggy. She would want you to use your life to help other people. We love you too, Steve, you are our family, and we will do anything for you." Tony turned and left the kitchen, going back to wake up the others for breakfast.

Steve let this sink in. He still hurt, and he could see that Tony still hurt because of the death of Yinsen. But maybe he could do this. He could live his life to help others, help the Avengers. He loved them too, and they loved him. He felt some of the pain of Peggy lift from his shoulders as his new found determination settled him.

He took a deep breath and looked at the picture of Peggy on the shelf above him. "I love you Peggy. Thank you for the dance."

**Hey everyone! This is my first fanfic ever, so I hope you liked it! Please review and give feedback!**


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